Archive for the ‘living your purpose’ Category

In the Blink of an Eye

Wednesday, October 8th, 2014

My eye disease comes from a rare genetic disorder. In fact, they can trace the gene mutation back to a family in Ireland. When my mother went blind at age 40, the disease was so rare it was misdiagnosed, and we were told it was not inheritable.

In my mid-30s I started having trouble seeing at night. Then things really got weird. While on a camping trip I looked at my coffee cup and it was no longer round. It looked as if Salvador Dali touched my cup and warped it with his cubist wand.

This began a five-year adventure of laser surgeries, lost vision, terror, divorce, and job loss. And then, one day I woke up and I could no longer read and drive.  My central vision left without leaving so much as a note, which I would not have been able to read anyway.

The journey from that day 20 years ago to this day has been transformative. I’ve learned to ask for help, surrender, and be grateful for what I have, instead of yearning  for what I’ve lost.  I now practice savoring each moment. Going blind set me on a rich spiritual path- One that still chills me to the bone occasionally, such as when I lose all my sight in one eye, even for a moment.

Before my mother died 10 years ago, her vision had worsened until she could barely see. She took prednisone because her carotid arteries were blocked and occasionally, get ready, she would lose total sight. Her biggest fear as she approached her death, was not the pain of bone cancer, or the exhaustion of trying to breathe due to emphysema. Her biggest fear was going completely blind.

I’m calling the doctor on Monday. I don’t want to call the doctor.  I do not want to have to arrange the trip to the doctor, or have to sit in the waiting room.   I don’t want to take steroids.  I do not want to take more tests, expensive tests. But more than that, I do not want to go blind because I’m too stubborn to find out what’s true.

Saying yes to what is

This is an example of being willing to say yes to what is. Or rather, saying yes to what might be. I must be willing, and you must be willing, to face the truth of what is happening. If we avoid the truth of what is happening, we cannot take action to free ourselves or to correct anything that’s gone awry in our lives.

I’m sharing about my temporary blindness because I almost didn’t tell my husband about it. I wanted to pretend that it didn’t happen and crawl under the house so to speak. But what I couldn’t forget, what dogged my thoughts, was the fear that I might be having a stroke. It scared me enough to go to the bathroom and take extra aspirin.

If you’re taking extra aspirin because you think you might have had a stroke, I think it’s a good idea to see a doctor. Even if you’re afraid you can’t hear really bad news.

What about You?

If you are still reading this story, and you are having any thoughts tingling in your brain, it could be a sign you are avoiding something you need to face. The sooner you say yes to what is, the sooner you’ll be free. The more you practice saying yes to what is, the better you get at it.

 I’ll let you know what the doctor says in my next newsletter. Let me know if I can help you face anything that’s scaring you.

Follow your bliss or it will stalk you,

Vicki Hannah Lein

PS.  The first song I wrote after I lost my central vision was “Gratitude.”  It reminds me to be grateful for what I’ve got instead of yearning after what I’ve lost.  May the song remind you to do the same.

Click here. 


 

Murray and the Ketchup

Wednesday, October 8th, 2014

First, I want to welcome all new members to this community. My intention is that every newsletter I send out makes you laugh, makes you think, and invites you to take action.

If you are having trouble finding your best in any situation in your life, reply to this e-mail for a free consultation. Any feedback you give me is a great gift, truly. Is there any issue you would like me to address?  Write a song about?

Post Valentine’s Day Massacre

Yikes!  Valentine’s Day can really set us up for failure.  My husband and I give each other the gift of celebrating Valentine’s Day every day, this takes off the pressure.

The Featured Article this month is a story of how I shifted from wanting to smack my beloved husband into wanting to smooch him instead. If you wish to print this story out, download this pdf. Otherwise… I hope you enjoy it.

Murray and the Ketchup Or When Attention Deficit Disorder Collides with Blindness

Excerpt from Woman with a voice:  Daring to Live Authentically Ever After by Vicki Hannah Lein

Because of my vision problems, Murray and I decided to organize the refrigerator in a way that would help me find things. The leftovers would go on the top shelf, milk and other large items on the second shelf, and so on.Murray readily agreed to this plan. He is an occupational therapist,after all, and he knows about making accommodations to help people perform necessary tasks, such as feeding yourself from the refrigerator. So why did the ketchup, among other things, keep getting moved?

“How thoughtless he is,” I said to myself. “How incredible, especially since he is a professional!” I fumed. “Does he hate me?” I wondered. “Does he have any idea how difficult it is to live with low vision? This is such a simple thing for him to do, and it makes a big difference to me. If he really loved me, the ketchup would stay put.”

We reviewed our plan. Murray again agreed that keeping things in the same place in the refrigerator was a reasonable request, and he should honor it. Yet the ketchup moved again, and I thought, “I hate him!” Well, I did not exactly hate him, but I was confused and hurt,and no matter how many times I confronted him, the ketchup still wandered the shelves of the refrigerator.

And then I thought of a new story: “Murray doesn’t hate me. I know he doesn’t hate me. He has attention deficit, is easily bored, and I’ll bet he is just projecting his boredom onto the ketchup. He thinks the ketchup bottle gets restless, so he moves it.”

Now this version is probably more true than the “He hates me” story I told myself, but that isn’t important. What is important is that changing my story changed how I felt about this continual problem. Instead of being angry and hurt, I laughed. It became a joke, and (here is the interesting part) the ketchup has stayed put ever since I shared my new story about why the ketchup was roving the refrigerator with the “culprit.”  Maybe Murray’s memory works better when it is bathed in love rather than irritation.

Your Turn
What little things could you do to love your sweetie better: bring her coffee in the morning? Hang up his clothes? Thank him for taking out the garbage? Tell him you are committed to being a better listener, not interrupt with solutions? Just come up to her and start rubbing her neck? Rub her feet every single day? (I promise, you will never hear, “Not tonight,honey. I have a headache.”) 
There’s a lot more where that came from in my book Woman with a Voice: Daring to live Authentically Ever After. 
It’s available on Kindle from Amazon, and, great news, you do not need a Kindle to read it! 


 

Suffering Mantra

Friday, February 7th, 2014

Welcome new readers! Let me know what speaks to you and what you would like to hear more about, if you will. My intention is that you get at least one thing that sticks with you and helps you when you need a sparkle of inspiration.

I’m suffering with the Lingering Crud, a virus that invites a new virus to replace it when it starts to die. Low energy meets a cough… Time to be extraordinarily kind to ourselves.

Smart Thoughts for Stupid Moments Podcast

is http://smartthoughtsforstupidmoments.libsyn.com/

In the last episode of Smart Thoughts for Stupid Moments, I regaled you with my Freedom Mantra based on the Four Agreements by Miguel Ruiz.
This episode turns the Freedom Mantra inside out and reminds us how we tend to add to our own suffering by: assuming bad things, taking everything personally, trying to more than our best, and speaking cruelly to ourselves. In this way we bind ourselves to our suffering and have no energy to play, love, and sing. So let’s call a Code You, as my dear friend the singing nurse Deb Gauldin would say, and WAKE Up, Deb’s website is: www.debgauldin.com

Valentine’s Day Giggle

This will make you laugh, guaranteed!

Beware of the Doghouse – YouTube

Remember: Trusting the process will set you free–eventually!

Smart Thoughts for the Holidays

Monday, December 2nd, 2013

Smart Thoughts for Stupid MomentsThanks to those of you who took the time to download Smart Thoughts for Stupid Moments or From Frustration to Funny in Ten Seconds Flat. Over one thousand downloads!  I feel a bit like the Velveteen Rabbit–I am a real writer!

Alas, the free download time is over, but the books are still less expensive than a holiday card, nudge, nudge, wink, wink. Here are the AMAZON links:

Smart Thoughts for Stupid Moments
From Frustration to Funny in Ten Seconds Flat

From Frustration to Funny in 10 seconds FlatNow, if you could do me a favor and take a moment to write a review, one or two sentences will do, you will be helping me out enormously.  A dear friend said recently, “If I had known how much it meant to you, I would have written a review sooner.”

It would mean a lot to me if you would take the time to write a review. I have more books in me, and getting them up in the Amazon charts will help keep me writing with joy and irreverence.

Bonus:  My “Unfrustrate Me!  I Dare You!”  challenge is still in effect.  If you have a situation that continues to defeat your sense of humor and sense of peace, give me a whack at it.  Email me and we can set up an appointment.  You can pass this bonus on to your friends instead of a holiday card.  Saves on the environment.

Smart Thought for the Holidays:  buy online – as paperback or ebook.   No post office.  No packaging.  No hunting for that perfect gift.  Grab a cup of coffee and surf. Click, Click, Gift message and you are done!

Follow your bliss or it will stalk you,

Vicki Hannah Lein

 P.S.  I am looking for someone who would like to proofread for me and perhaps help in some other ways.  Who knows?  Perhaps you could evolve into a travel companion.  I might be going to Istanbul in November of 2014…

Living Wide Open

Tuesday, August 20th, 2013

August 20, 2013 

Hi [[firstname]]

Welcome to all new subscribers. My intention is help make your life a little bit better. I want to metaphorically Speaking, blow on the embers of hope and creativity within you. Yahoo.

One Request and Three Recommendations

Woman with a VoiceFirst of all, I have a favor to ask.  In 2003 after my mother died, I spent two years writing a book, Woman with a Voice:  Daring to Live Authentically Ever After.

A friend told me later that my book and I co-created each other.  She was right.  Every day for months and months I summoned up all my courage to write through my shame and self-doubt:  Who did I think I was anyway?  I was making a fool of myself, being self-indulgent, narcissistic, and pathetic.  And, besides that, I couldn’t write.

Still I wrote, seconds away from “select all/delete.”  In 2005 I self-published my creation, only to be hit with a crashing wave of fear.  I would be killed for telling my story.  “They” would kill me.

So, as it turns out, stepping out in the world and being just ourselves turns out to be a heroic act for anyone who does it.  My book, full of flaws I’m sure, is also one thing for sure:  a courageous act of living wide open.

Here’s the favor I ask of you:  my book is now available on Kindle and in other places electronically.  I ask you to download my book and write an honest review.  Dip in, read a bit, and see what you think.

Asking this makes me feel vulnerable.  I’m hoping, though, that if you have gotten any benefit from my newsletters over the years, you will seriously consider my request. 

Here is where you can get Woman with a Voice: Daring to Live Authentically EveAfter on Kindle from Amazon.com and other places electronically:
Amazon.com
Barnes and Noble

 

Thank you.  More, please.
First Recommendation: A Sweet Movie

HappyThankyouMorePlease – My first recommendation is a quirky, sweet, well-written movie about love, art, vulnerability, and trust.  It’s on Netflix.

Second Recommendation

A book, Tattoos On The Heart by Gregory Boyle, the priest who has worked for decades with gangs in the barrios.  Poetic, surprising, and full of heart-breaking yet inspiring stories, this is a book that changed my DNA.  I’m listening to it again and plan to listen to it regularly as one of my spiritual practices.  For those of you who believe in God, this is religion at its best.  For those of you who don’t, it’s religion at its best, what living with a big God heart inside you can do for the world and for you.

Third Recommendation

Another movie. Raw Faith : Alive Mind Cinema, a documentary about Marilyn Sewell, an outspoken and socially progressive Unitarian minister. This movie is also about love, vulnerability, and trust.  I got the phrase “living wide open” from her.

All three of these recommendations are treats for the soul, what we need to ingest so we can keep waking up willing to live wide open and be filled with gratitude for all of our blessings as we take on our challenges, and the challenges of those we love.

Here’s my audio with more thoughts about Living Wide Open:    Click HERE

As usual, I invite you to follow your bliss or it will stalk you,

Vicki

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Read some of my past articles on my blog

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